More Than Points

INT. AIRPORT SECURITY AREA – MORNING

Typical Monday morning at the nation’s busiest airport (Ohare). People, mostly business travelers, are everywhere waiting…and waiting…and waiting…to get through security screening.

INT. SECURITY SCREENING AREA – CONTINUOUS

Scott (shaved head, 30) is placing various items into the plastic bins, for screening. He drops his sandwich bag of specially wrapped toiletries into a bin, rolling down the conveyer belt. A TSA employee takes notice of the sandwich bag.

TSA EMPLOYEE #1

What the hell is this??

The TSA employee grabs the plastic bag and holds it up. Another TSA employee takes notice and comes over.

SCOTT

Is there a problem?

The second TSA employee grabs the bag and looks closely at the contents through the clear plastic.

TSA EMPLOYEE #2

No, we’re just yelling for no reason what-so-ever. Of course there’s a problem. Your toothpaste is four point six ounces and the limit is three ounces!

SCOTT

Okay…fine. Get rid of it.

TSA EMPLOYEE #2 (ignoring Scott, calling out to another TSA employee)

Hey, check this out. This guy was trying to sneak through security with an illegal-sized tube of toothpaste.

TSA Employee #3, who should be screening the the luggage comes over.

TSA EMPLOYEE #3 (to Scott)

You can’t have liquids in containers that are over three ounces. Did you know that was illegal???

People waiting behind Scott show their impatience.

SCOTT Okay, can you just throw it out, so I can get to my flight?

TSA EMPLOYEE #2

Absolutely not. You need to leave the line and throw the toothpaste out yourself.

SCOTT

I’m not going to leave the line. You throw it out.

TSA EMPLOYEE #3

Hold on, buddy. That’s the rules – we don’t know what could be in that toothpaste tube.

Another TSA employee notices the commotion and comes over.

TSA EMPLOYEE #4

What’s the problem here?

TSA EMPLOYEE #1

This guy was trying to sneak a container of liquids through security that was over three ounces.

SCOTT

I wasn’t trying to sneak anything through security. It was a mistake.

TSA EMPLOYEE #4

Okay, so throw it out and get this line moving.

TSA EMPLOYEE #2

We can’t do that. We don’t know what’s in the container!

TSA EMPLOYEE #1

Exactly! He needs to leave the line and throw it out himself.

SCOTT

It’s GOD DAMN TOOTHPASTE!

A 5th TSA employee, apparently the most senior of these TSA robots, overhears Scott’s agitation and walks over.

SENIOR TSA EMPLOYEE

Why isn’t the line moving? What’s the problem?

TSA Employee #1

This guy, he has toothpaste…it’s too big…

The first four TSA employees give each other nervous glances. The senior TSA looks annoyed.

TSA EMPLOYEE #4 (whispers)

Just throw it out!

The first TSA employee pulls the toothpaste out of the bag and tosses it into a nearby garbage can. The senior TSA employee rolls his eyes and leaves.

TSA EMPLOYEE #1

You’re free to go. Please be more careful with what liquid container sizes you pack. Have a marvelous Monday.

Scott, face red, grabs his bag and runs through security.